14 posts tagged “run”

I ran the Double Dipsea this weekend and came in second in my age group...but the best part was that Mr. Lawyer was there cheering me on at the finish line. Friday night, I was planning on going on a short jog to loosen my legs up and then was going to stay in and chill so that I would be well rested and hydrated for my race. He called and wanted to come over and chill with me which was nice. We ate dinner and then cuddled, had great sex and went to sleep. He also said he wanted to come to the race which was a surprise. He drove me there early in the morning, was being super sweet and kissing me, holding me in public. He said he would go surf while I ran and then be back to watch me cross the finish. I was a little nervous he wouldn't get back in time or show up but as I was coming in, I could hear his voice and I saw him standing there with his phone out taking a picture of me. When I got to the end of the finish, the volunteers were trying to take the stub from my bib to record my time and were mad at me for pinning it up so they couldn't easily tear it off. He was standing there trying to help and holding me as I was feeling a little shaky and sick - it was a really HOT day out there and one of the most challenging runs I've ever completed. Anyway, not only did he come and cheer me on at the finish line, but he also brought me a cooler full of ice cold Blue Moons. We stayed and drank a beer - watched my other friend finish - and then layed on the grass and waited for the award ceremony - he was insistent that we wait since I came in 2nd in my division. I've never felt more into him than I did at this moment - and while its scary and I may get hurt, I'm still really happy when I'm around him and don't want to push him away or out of my life.

We hung out the rest of the day - he napped, I did some errands. We used my new toy (thank to N who sent it as a joke) and then got ready to go out to dinner. We had reservations at Pres a Vi in the Presidio. I was starving and it was very good. I had halibut and great wine. Afterward, we took a little walk and then decided to go to the bars. We went to Mauna Loa and Balboa. He was being sweet but there have also been some things on my mind. At one point, he called me his girlfriend - but am I really his girlfriend yet? It doesn't feel like we're completely back together...I am enjoying "taking thing slowly."

Sunday, we woke up and went to church. Afterward, he suggested we go to Velo Rouge Cafe near his place and have mimosas and a little something to eat. He's been so fun lately. We watched the last few minutes of the soccer game, ate a bagel, drank mimosas and then headed over to the De Young to see the Chihuly exhibit. We had stopped at Safeway to get drinks because he was in the mood to drink before we went in. We had these disgusting drinks - similar to Sparks - but called Tilt. He kept toasting me and saying, "let's get tilted!" CUTE. The exhibit was awesome - we took a bunch of pictures to send to his grandma. He kept askign about my PTO as I think he wants to invite me to join he and his family in Florida later this summer.

WE got back from Chihuly and were starving. I made Ziti - it was bombtastic. Then, he wanted to get work done and wanted me to come with. We went to his office, worked adn then over to Y and C's to pick up my bridesmaid dress. He was being so amazing last night.

I was so exhausted when we finally got home - I think I passed right out. But woke up to all these strange nightmares - I actually screamed in my sleep. He held me tighter and asked me if I was ok. I don't know what that was all about - the strange dreams - but this morning was so tired, I slept through my alarm. I always hate to see him go in teh morning.

I went out with Mr. Midwest last night and I felt like I was in a parallel universe - like maybe I should have been sitting on my back patio looking out on my cornfields and six kids instead of sitting at Bin38 sipping Tempranillo from Argentina.

Mr. Midwest is a REALLY nice guy but not my type in terms of looks or personality. Looks wise - let's just say he has almost jerry curl blonde hair and is maybe 5'9. He's straight up from Nebraska and trying the big city life. He is by no means cultured - doesn't know boxed wine from a bottle, hasn't travelled much (besides his little CA adventure) and is looking for love, marriage, and children from a good, sweet woman.

At Bin38, we had one glass of wine and I could barely drink it which is a shame given how much I love their Tempranillo and I was dissapointed he didn't offer to get any food which I felt bad asking for especially since I knew I wouldn't be staying or chatting too long. I was feeling funny yesterday - had this strange pressure on the left side of my face all day - ran to track after work and then ran track practice, rushed home to shower/change and then met Mr. Midwest around 9:30 for some wine. When I got to the bar, my face felt flushed and the pressure was even worse than it had been while I was at work. And every sip I took, made me want to gag (very strange for me to gag on good wine). While I might normally use being sick as an excuse to get out of a really bad date, this wasn't the case. He wasn't a bad date or a bad guy, he's just not the man for me and I REALLY did feel funny.

With about five or six generous sips of wine left in my glass, I told him I just wasn't feeling that great and asked him to get the bill. He was understanding but I could tell he was dissapointed. I walked home and passed right out and all I thought about/dreamt of last night was Mr. Lawyer (pathetic, I know).

Then, I decided to get up early and hit the gym (as if track wasn't enough for me) and ended up seeing Mr. Lawyer. He looked so cute. His hair was like matted to his head and he was wearing these completely nerdy old man shorts while he was rocking out to his iPod on one of the girly cardio machines. We didn't acknowledge one another even though he called yesterday afternoon saying he wanted to see me. I kept glancing at him in the mirror careful not to let him see that I saw him. Ugh. I hate that I still think he's hot - even when he looks like the biggest dork in the gym. I wanted to walk up and kiss him and say something flirty and teasing like, "nice shorts old man..."

Ugh.

I'm supposed to go on yet another date with yet another guy tonight but really just don't feel like going. I am seriously considering cancelling because I know I won't  be impressed.

So I've decided that I might have possibly met my future husband at the gym. Well, ok, I lie. I didn't actually ever meet the guy but I've worked out next to him the last three times I've been there and all by coincidence. It seems that either I'm already there and then the machine next to me opens up and he's on it or vice versa. And then, once we've finished cardio, we always seem to be next to one another doing our thing, getting our buff on in the weight room. He's tall and handsome -not exactly my type - but he smells so delicious while he's running next to me on the treadmill. I don't know what it is - maybe he's sweating off after shave, cologne, deodorant or maybe its just his scent. Whatever it is, its intoxicating and I kind of can't stand it.

So last night, I'm waiting on a machine and talking with my co-worker who happens to be there. Then, a treadmill opens up and I zip over only to be pleasantly surprised that its HIM, My Future Husband yet again. I take in the scent. He smirks at me like he's acknowledging our strange coincidences but I don't say anything. We're both always wearing iPods. I try to look straight ahead while I run to avoid him cathing me staring at him in the mirror or worse staring at his biceps. Ha! And as usual, after I finish my cardio, I  head over to do some free weights and there he is next to the only empty bench.

To make matters even stranger, I was on my way home (he had left about 10-15 minutes prior) and I ran into him again! He was still in gym clothes but carrying a tennis racket. We almost ran right into each other - again the headphones and the smirk. It was the tennis racket that did me in - god knows I love a man with some tennis skills. :)

I need to sneak a peek and see if he has a ring....I guess that would foil all of my plans for him, for "us." Hahaha.

Ok, I really need to get out of here - now I'm just being creepy!

Mr. Lawyer called again last night before I went to the gym. I asked him when he was going to just STOP. What was the point of the phone calls? The visits? Any of it? He says he doesn't know what he wants and yet he's the one who broke my heart. He still wants to talk to me, see me, hang out with me and I don't know why. When I ask, he says he just enjoys being around me. So, then why did you break up with me asshole? He doesn't seem to have an answer for that.

I'm over feeling angry so I've just been very level-headed and honest with him about the whole thing and how it makes me feel. Instead of acting like I don't care about him, I just ask him over and over if he understands what he does to me when he calls all the time and if he realizes how hard that it is for me to get over it and move on. He says he's not sure that we're over forever - well what are you sure of?

A part of me (obviously) still wants him back in my life but another part of me questions his motives. And when I tell him that up-front, he seems offended like I should know that his intentions are good. I feel like there is no way for me to know that - he didn't communicate with me when we broke up and he was pretty rude about the whole thing.

I am not sure how I feel right now. I am not sure I could trust him to be dependable and there for me.

On another note, I blew off The Reverend (yet again!!!) last night. I mean we didn't exactly make plans or anything but he seemed all disappointed that I couldn't make time for him last night or tonight. I guess he leaves for a week on Wednesday. I had legitimate excuses for not hanging out. Monday was Monday - I wanted to go to the gym after work and organize/clean my life and apartment. And tonight, I'm headed to the Giant's game with the girls. I'm not sure how I feel about someone being so needy and dependent all the time so we'll see if this last another date or not. He's gone for a week on Wednesday....that will give me some much needed space/time.

Tomorrow night, I have a date with Mr. Midwest. We're meeting at Bin38 after I get back from track. We'll see how that one goes.

Excited for the game tonight - almost time!! WOO HOO!

My weekend deserved three posts - one for the horny teen-ager, the other for the sailing adventure and the third for my 18K race (the Mt. Tam Wild Boar 18K). When I first woke up at 5:30, I was wondering why I'd signed up to race at all. Then my ride got to my place and we drove up through Marin on a very beautiful morning and I instantly cheered up. I got out to the start and about 33 or so people from my club were there ready to race. It was exciting to see everyone. One girl, A, who I haven't seen in years was there with her very handsome roommate, The Tri Guy. God, he was attractive. She mentioned that she'd like to introduce me to him - so I'm thinking - yes, yes, yes. He eventually comes over before the race starts and says hello (mind you - this is before 8 am on Saturday morning and I have no make-up on and basically look like shit).

We set off to run - he was doing the 10K and I the 18K. As I finish the race, I see him near the finish line. He comes up and says, "hey, wow - excellent run!" I'm all smiles. We continue to chat for a bit and then I excuse myself to go cheer on others in my club. After everyone finished racing, we all headed over to P's house for after-run brunch. The Tri Guy came too (hooray!!).  I do my best to pay him some attention but not too much. He definitely was paying attentinon.

After the brunch, I realized we never did exchange numbers. I'm not sure I want to reach out to my friend A to make it happen or just be patient and hope he and I find one another again somehow soon....

I'm signing my ass up for more races. Hooray!

In the midst of The Horny Teen-ager madness this weekend, I also managed to go on this amazing sailing trip with this guy who I semi-dated (who know has a girlfriend) before Mr. Lawyer and a few of his friends. It was the most amazing thing I've ever done - we were out on the water for close to 6 hours - spray of the ocean, the cold wind, the thrill (I honestly never knew sailing could be so thrilling) and the group.

I was a little nervous to go along at first being that I only knew The Tall Hot Blonde (guy I dated before Mr. Lawyer) but showed up at the Pier anyway. I had finished an 18K race earlier in the day so was feeling a little tired but ready for another adventure. When I got there, it was just me and him. We chatted, caught up, and he gave me a tour of the boat which happened to be 50 years old!! Then, his friends started arriving until there were 12 of us - and two happened to be cute, single, and very eligible guys. I was a happy girl. There was also a couple on the boat, G and L, who were ridiculously nice and fun.

We sailed all around the bay together - from the Pier, around Alcatraz and back to the Piers to watch the big KFOG Kaboom concert. We didn't have an anchor so we literally just drifted around the general area where the concert was taking place, had some champagne and chatted. Then, we watched the fireworks from the water....and returned to land. By the time we got back to the docks, it was close too 11 pm and I was exhausted! One of the cute, single eligible guys, also known as The CEO, drove me home and asked for my number so he could take me out to dinner (sushi dinner to be exact). So we'll see.

The other guy, Mr. Ocean Beach is still a bit of a mystery. I wonder if I'll run into him again....or how I will run into him again....muah hahahaha muah hahahah...

I met this English guy who we'll call The Horny Teen-ager at Circa a week or so ago (yes, the same place where I got dumped a week ago by Mr. Lawyer). From the get-go, I knew The Horny Teen-ager was too young for me. I mean, we're only technically less than a year apart but in mental age, I'd say we're more like a decade apart.

For the first date, we grabbed a drink the night after we met. The first thing I noticed was that he was a total pretty boy - too much gel in the hair, a pseudo faux -hawk, and way way overly expensive jeans. While I understand that he's European, I still wasn't a fan. He has a total babyface so we got carded the minute we sat down at A16 which I definitely thought was funny. Anyway, all in all the first date was ok. The second date was dinner. I had a race early the next morning so told him I couldn't stay out late and nor did I want to. We went to Panta Rei in North Beach - I could sense he was hoping I wasn't too hungry although he did pay. After the restaurant, we grabbed a beer at Tony Nick's and he made a play for my face. Literally tried to suck me up in one swipe. I did the not so fast hand maneuver and somehow got him off of me gracefully. We said goodnight and he didn't seem too miffed by the whole thing - well, except he called me a cab from the corner but didn't offer to pay. So, he called and texted all weekend. He was dying to see me again so he proposed a Sunday night movie. I had some errands to run so we went to the Haight first, grabbed some food and then headed back to the Marina to catch a flick. I noticed during dinner that he was sporting a hicky on his neck. I laughed to myself. Then, we looked up movie times and nothing was playing till way way late and I was pretty over having to hang out with him for that many hours. But low and behold, I didn't have to. He instantly went for it - pounced on me and tried sucking my face off again. He got upset that I wouldn't kiss back and then only tried harder. I called him out on the hicky. First, he tried to tell me it was from wrestling with the guys (and I'm thinking or your middle school aged girlfriend?) and then he admitted to his little love fest the night before. He came up with a million and one excuses about his drunken state and why it happened all while I kept insisting that it didn't matter to me either way. Eventually, he pounced again - only this time I could feel him on my leg - GROSS!! So I swatted at him and said, "down boy..you remind me of a horny teen-ager..." He got off, looked wounded and made some jack-ass remark about my sex drive (as I'm thinking - what do you know little man) to repair his own ego. I let it go.

He left without saying goodbye. I laughed myself downstairs to give the download to my girlfriend B. Later, I received several text messages from him saying how cool of a chick I was, and how much he liked  me. Right. I wrote back in the nicest manner I know how, "Aw, thanks but I think its best we're just friends. We're on a different page in our lives right now. I wish you all the best in your SF adventures and to many more hicky-filled nights. Cheers, Jski."

I thought that would be the end but got a text from him this morning asking me to grab dinner with him later in the week. Are you serious? Boys..teen-agers...geez.

I did some major retail therapy yesterday and realized break-ups can be good for one thing. I bought my very first size 24 pair of Seven jeans ever!!! I'm so excited. I know many people would wonder why the f* I care...and if you do, well just know that I'm a total girl about these things.

I had time to kill before meeting Mr. Analyst (the guy I met in NYC during my client's media dinner) and his friends frmo business school for drinks. We were meeting at the Westin on Market so I figured I'd go to Bloomie's since it was only a block away. Bad move. I spent way toooo much. But, maybe it was just what I needed.

Anyway, met up with Mr. Analyst and his buddy at the Westin bar, Ducca and had a couple of glasses of wine. Then, we went to Ozumo and had this amazing sushi dinner and sake. YUM!! We closed down the place talking....it was totally fun...and the best part was, I got out of there without spending a dime. When I glanced at the open bill (about $400), I thanked the lord that it wasn't my card going in there. :)

Tonight, I'm headed out with Mr. English boy for dinner but can't stay out late. I have a race in the morning and have to be up early and ready to run...

Tomorrow is also sailing day..we'll see how it all pans out.

I did a bad, bad thing. I flirted with temptation - possibly with disaster.

Mr. Lawyer and I are still "together" but something is strange, not right. We had this long talk after the break-up and he decided he wasn't really ready to be broken up, that he wanted to keep trying. Problem is - for how long? And what is his reason? I can't help but keep wondering? Is he waiting for that chick to come around and see how wonderful is he? Or is it something else entirely? He tells me its because he's "not certain..." and felt "trapped."

I went and ran my relay and had a f*ing fantastic time this past weekend. Sometimes doing something challenging that you're good at can be the BEST ego boost in the world and it was definitely what I was needing. I left for the weekend, didn't contact him at all - gave him his SPACE - and he ended up contacting me and acting like "Super Boyfriend" for a day or so. Now, we're sort of back to where we were. He was being distant last night and acting bored. I told him he should go out, do something with his friends - I was working. He stayed anyway. I wanted to have sex, to make love to be touched and I got nothing for the past several days.

Yesterday, an old flame reappeared in my inbox. One of those flames that sort of passion-wise never went out. We started chatting over email casually - it was small talk - how are you? life? family? friends? Then, it got downright dirty. Somehow we started reminiscing about this entirely wonderful passionate weekend and then it sort of became email sex. Jesus! I've never done something like that before. It almost went too far - and then I thought to myself, what am I doing? I feel terrible about it - I've never cheated - and while I didn't do anything physical, a part of me feels very guilty for even thinking/talking about it. I don't know what to think now - if he doesn't start to pay attention to me soon, I don't know if I can keep being there for him.

Ugh - no more emailing dirty messages though. I've got to keep that one under wraps or my IT guy is going to find out. :)

Here I go - off to a fresh start.

I woke up this morning feeling light - totally weightless, rejuvenated and refreshed. I was in such a rut over the past several weeks. My relationships were in shambles, my head felt like it was going to explode, I cried, broke up, made up, cried some more and then woke up this morning and felt like a huge weight had been lifted from my shoulders. I think I'm finally ready to make a change, a big change for the better. No more sulking. No more bad attitude. No more negativity. I'm ready for all of that to change.

Mr. Lawyer and I went to Tahoe this weekend - just us, no one else was up at the cabin. It was nice to spend time one on one with him and sort of be "trapped" together in the mountains. I made my first step towards a new me - I put all of my worries, frustrations, and fear aside and just enjoyed him, enjoyed us. I didn't hassle him to wake up early, let him take his time getting on the mountain, waited for him on the hill, took breaks when he wanted to and ended the day early so we could watch the games - all with a smile on my face. We watched the games together, drank a bunch and acted the way we did in the beginning before things got complicated. Afterward, we got a pizza and rented Atonement. While we watched the movie, he did things he used to do when things felt "right." He pulled me towards him, held me to him and was affectionate. He smiled at me and kissed me - something I feel like he hasn't done in quite a long time.I've decided whether or not he still wants to be with me or ever falls in love with me, I'm just going to let things be and enjoy the ride.

I also emailed B today and told her how I felt. No more faking the tough shell or acting like it doesn't matter to me. My letter was honest, sincere and all in all a little scary to send but I feel better that I said what I needed to say. Even if she never speaks to me again, writes back or whatever, I'll always feel better knowing that I tried.

I'm throwing negativity out the door today. I woke up early today, went to the gym, had a healthy breakfast at home and already I'm feeling 90% better. Out with the junk food that I think had part in my mood swings, the negativity, adn everything else....and in with me, positive me.